The Weight Comment

Do you remember the 1st ”weight comment” that started your weight issues?

I try not to focus on weight on this blog, but I decided I’d  share my story of how my ”weight issue” started with one comment.

Early Years

I remember getting measured at my ballet school for a costume and the lady doing the measurements said, ”Oh , wow your bigger than the other girls”!

I remember thinking ”What is she talking about?”

I was only 12 yrs. old, but I knew I did not look like the other girls in my class. I was taller, thicker and the only black girl: hence I had a butt! 

I didn’t think there was anything wrong with my body, but I later started watching what I ate and going on a diet with a friend at school. Our diet consisted of salad and pizza , whenever we had ”hot lunches”. We thought eating salad would make us skinny, when honestly we were average size for 12 yr old girls.

High School Years…

 I didn’t have a problem with weight in high school. I played sports and never thought about weight; too occupied with sports and school. I was involved in track, basketball and volleyball. I was active almost every day and ate anything I wanted.

College Years…

I was still involved in sports and I gained and lost the freshmen 15. I tried ”eating one meal a day”, ”calorie counting” and ”extreme exercise”.  I finally settled on ”extreme exercise for my emotional eating”, which only led to unhealthy habits down the road.

I finally stopped ”extreme exercising” ; ate normally and worked out. Maintaining a healthy weight, but still having issues with ”emotional eating”.

 Now…

I battled emotional eating and let the scale control my feelings on a daily basis.   I started using sparkpeople, in 2006 to count calories and keep a journal of exercise. Which helped me lose weight, but I eventually stopped using the program.

I started gaining  3 years ago along with the desk job and the occasional cocktail after work plus partying with friends. I still struggle with emotional eating once in a blue moon, but switch my focus to reading a book, eating a healthy treat or doing some Yoga.

I started reading blogs in 2009, in search of  ”fitnesss tips” which led me to Caitlin’s blog  ”See Bride Run” (now Healthy Tipping Point); later inspiring me to start my own.  A fun way to learn new recipes, eat right, exercise and have support through the blogging community.  

I still struggle with weight, but I don’t let it consume me on a daily basis. I focus on working out, eat healthy and being happy.

Moment of Weakness…

Yesterday my co-worker made a rude comment about my weight. I started having those thoughts of fasting, extreme exercising and stuffing my face with fast food.  I went home bummed and pulled out the scale, shed a tear.  Nothing had changed in number (in 4 months) ….but I felt good about myself.

I knew I needed to let the comment go and focus on what I’ve been doing: eating right and working out.  I do not want ”emotional eating” to consume me again or the number on the scale.  Look at how far I’ve come….

1. I’ve controlled  my emotional eating
2. I focus on eating good wholesome foods
3. I exercise daily
4. I do not compare myself to others

I will not let comments control my day to day lifestyle and trigger old habits of emotional eating!!

Everyone on twitter made me feel so much better this morning. I realized I’ve come to far to go back down a unhealthy road. I can not let comments affect me and will not let  people control my train of thought.  

Keep pushing on, stay positive and focus on what makes you happy.

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